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Jokes

The following are the best jokes I’ve collected from e-mails and other sources. Only one, Holiday Shopping Fun, is a Joe Kaczmarek original. These jokes are grouped into categories to help you find the jokes you might want to read.

Please note: Some of these jokes may be considered by some to be obscene or rude. Please proceed at your own comedy risk.

Categories:

• Alcohol and Drinking
• Bodily Functions
• Computers
• Education and School
• Ethnic and Stereotypes
• Lists
• Men vs. Women
• Miscellaneous
• Political and Government
• Relationships
• Religion
• Seasonal
• Sex
• Troublemakers
• Women vs. Men
• Work and Stress

Alcohol and Drinking

• Alcohol Warnings
• Bar Room Translations
• Drunk’s Lost Car
• Empire State Building Bar
• Fuel For Thought
• Moral Of The Story
• Not Drunk
• Recipe For Christmas Rum Cake
• Stupid Crooks
• The Bartender
• The Drinker’s Alphabet
• The New Priest
• The Patch

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Bodily Functions

• A Hole Behind
• Flatulence
• Fuel For Thought
• The Importance Of Education
• The Shit List
• The Woman Who Loved Beans
• Who’s In Charge?

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Computers

• Bill Gates At The Pearly Gates
• Computer Terms
• If Abbott And Costello Worked In Tech Support
• Tech Support Nietzsche Style
• The 12 days of AOL

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Education and School

• Creative Writing
• Dade County Florida High School Math Proficiency Exam
• Final Test
• Moral Of The Story
• New Classes
• Taste Test
• The Drinker’s Alphabet
• The Importance Of Correct Punctuation
• The Importance Of Education

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Ethnic and Stereotypes

• An Italian’s Tale
• Blondes’ Revenge
• Dade County Florida High School Math Proficiency Exam
• First Place
• Party In Vermont
• Redneck Haiku
• Smart Fella
• Southern Slang
• The Other Day On The Plane
• The Patch
• Top Ten Changes At NASA To Accommodate 76 Year-Old John Glenn’s Return To Space Aboard The Shuttle Discovery
• Turner Brown
• Who’s Smarter? Blonde or Lawyer?

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Lists

• 10 Things That Sound Dirty At Thanksgiving But Aren’t
• 15 Things Not To Say When Getting Pulled Over
• 16 Signs It’s Time To Abandon Your Space Station
• 20 Ways To Confuse Trick-Or-Treaters
• 25 Ways To Torture Your Roommate At Christmas
• 30 More Things We Have Learned From The Movies
• 50 Fun Things To Do At Wal-Mart
• Alcohol Warnings
• Applicant Speak
• Best Excuses If You Get Caught Sleeping In Your Cubicle
• Bumper Stickers
• Diet Rules
• Employer Talk
• Holiday Shopping Fun
• How To Respond To Pickup Lines
• How You Can Tell When It’s Going To Be A Rotten Day
• Medical Misstatements
• Men’s 41 Rules For Women
• Some Ideas To Get Rid Of Telemarketers
• Southern Slang
• The Drinker’s Alphabet
• The Good, The Bad, And The Worse
• The Shit List
• The World’s Shortest Books
• The Worst Pick Up Lines
• Top Ten Changes At NASA To Accommodate 76 Year-Old John Glenn’s Return To Space Aboard The Shuttle Discovery
• Top Ten Reasons The Star Wars Characters Would Kick Butt In The Star Trek Universe
• Top Ten Reasons Why Trick-Or-Treating Is Better Than Sex
• Top Ten Things Men Shouldn’t Say Out Loud When Shopping In Victoria’s Secret
• Top Ten Things You’ll Never Hear a Dad Say
• You Know You Are No Longer A Kid When
• You Know You’re Too Stressed If

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Men vs. Women

• He/She Definitions
• Men’s 41 Rules For Women
• My Needs
• New Classes

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Miscellaneous

• A Morning Accident
• Basic Rules For Cats Who Have A House To Run
• Fast Thinking
• Hunter’s Diary
• Life is Backwards
• More Ways To Use A Condom
• My Exercise Diary
• The Traffic Jam
• Veterinary Visit

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Political and Government

• Clinton’s Jog
• Clinton’s Lawn
• Hog Raising
• Hu’s on First
• Lewinsky’s Letter
• Stupid Crooks
• What To Wear To The IRS
• www.DoublePunch.com - Election 2000 Ballot Fun

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Relationships

• My Needs
• The Bartender
• The Restaurant

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Religion

• A Teacher, A Garbage Collector, And A Lawyer at Heaven
• Bill Gates At The Pearly Gates
• Dear Dr. Laura
• Jesus Is Watching You
• Pope vs. Jews
• Rabbis Debate
• The New Priest
• The Pastor
• Three Men At The Pearly Gates
• Where Do Pets Come From?

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Seasonal

• 10 Things That Sound Dirty At Thanksgiving But Aren’t
• 20 Ways To Confuse Trick-Or-Treaters
• 25 Ways To Torture Your Roommate At Christmas
• Holiday Shopping Fun
• Recipe For Christmas Rum Cake
• The 12 days of AOL
• Top Ten Reasons Why Trick-Or-Treating Is Better Than Sex
• Winter Tale
• Winter Diary

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Sex

• A Trip to China
• Buttercups
• Clinton’s Jog
• Coctail Party Conversation
• Do You Believe In Genies?
• First Place
• Indian Ride
• Lewinsky’s Letter
• Little Johnny’s Story
• No Peeking
• Raisin Bread
• Snatch Eating Frogs
• The Bartender
• The Importance Of Education
• The Little Old Lady
• The Other Day On The Plane
• The Pastor
• Top Ten Reasons Why Trick-Or-Treating Is Better Than Sex
• Top Ten Things Men Shouldn’t Say Out Loud When Shopping In Victoria’s Secret
• Turner Brown
• What Are You Thinking?

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Troublemakers

• A Big Hole In The Ground
• A Kiss On The Train
• Basic Rules For Cats Who Have A House To Run
• Buttercups
• Creative Writing
• Dark Economics
• Do You Believe In Genies?
• Empire State Building Bar
• Happy Butt
• How To Plan A Wedding
• Little Johnny’s Story
• Proctologist’s Examination
• Taste Test
• The Lucky Frog

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Women vs. Men

• Blondes’ Revenge
• Flatulence
• He/She Definitions
• How To Respond To Pickup Lines
• New Classes
• The Rules
• Who’s Smarter? Blonde or Lawyer?

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Work and Stress

• Applicant Speak
• Best Excuses If You Get Caught Sleeping In Your Cubicle
• Corporate America Recreation Preferences
• Dieting Under Stess
• Employer Talk
• If Abbott And Costello Worked In Tech Support
• Tech Support Nietzsche Style
• Why We’re So Tired
• You Know You’re Too Stressed If

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Miscellaneous

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